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#1
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01-30-2025, 06:33 PM
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 ♚ Legacy Gold Member ♚ Poster Rank:273 Join Date: Aug 2022 Posts: 4,752
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Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
Mérida, Venezuela A 60-year-old night watchman, José L.Z.D., lost his left arm when, whilst drunk, he entered the lion enclosure at the zoo he worked at and attempted to pet one of the lions through the bars of their cage. According to some reports, José spent the day drinking with friends, and despite being intoxicated and being warned to rest, he decided to carry out his duties.  ·  ·  ·  ·  · |
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#2
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01-30-2025, 07:25 PM
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 ♚ Legacy Gold Member ♚ Poster Rank:202 Iceman Join Date: Aug 2017 Posts: 7,506 Mentioned: 19 Post(s) Quoted: 3630 Post(s)
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
. Man-burger |
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#3
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01-30-2025, 08:48 PM
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 ♚ Legacy Gold Member ♚ Poster Rank:128 Happy Happy Happy Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 12,507 Mentioned: 20 Post(s) Quoted: 4126 Post(s)
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
Good Simba
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#4
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01-31-2025, 03:33 AM
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 ★ Legacy Member ★ Poster Rank:119 Secret Agent Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 13,407 Mentioned: 6 Post(s) Quoted: 2830 Post(s)
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
They’re considered “wild” animals for a reason.  |
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#5
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01-31-2025, 03:56 AM
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 My Rank: SECOND LIEUTENANT Poster Rank:246 Male Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 5,571
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
good lion  |
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#6
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01-31-2025, 01:37 PM
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 The Devil's Left Hand Poster Rank:70 Male Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 22,183 Mentioned: 18 Post(s) Quoted: 9550 Post(s)
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
He forgot to cast the magical spell Pspsps to calm the lion.
__________________ Why so sad? Your tears are no match for mine. |
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#7
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01-31-2025, 05:43 PM
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| ♚ Legacy Gold Member ♚ Poster Rank:99 Male Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 16,608 Mentioned: 7 Post(s) Quoted: 4579 Post(s)
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
The Lion only attacked him after he had first dis-armed him. Seems fine to me!  |
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#8
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01-31-2025, 07:40 PM
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 My Rank: LANCE CORPORAL Poster Rank:1878 Join Date: Oct 2011 Posts: 272 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Quoted: 184 Post(s)
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
Fuck around and find out.
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#9
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02-01-2025, 04:34 AM
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 ✝Mudderator from Hell✝ Poster Rank:11 e-mail Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 95,209
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
that's how to sober up instantly  |
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#10
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02-01-2025, 09:03 PM
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 ♚ Legacy Gold Member ♚ Poster Rank:267 ꓕSIꓤIꓕ∀S ϽINOᗡꓤ∀S Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 5,114
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Re: Drunk Security Guard Tried to Pet a Lion in Enclosure; Lost An Arm
No video, but found the audio transcript: "Heeeere kitty-katty-kitty... aaaaaahhhhHHHH!!!"
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