How Not to Get a Date - Thief Asks Victim Out

[DannyDrama]

I'd have got naked, smothered myself in cream, waited on her bed, and shouted 'COME AT ME, BITCH!' when she came home. That's how you REALLY charm a woman.

[diamondsmiles]

Originally Posted by Dynamo47

If I were the thief I would have at least serenaded her.

When she came in I would have had the room glowing with candles and the entry way lined with rose petals.

As her curiosity got the best of her, her nose would have been assaulted with a smell of a delicious dinner and found me naked with just an apron on cooking, cleaning, and doing her dishes.

THAT would have been much more of a turn on.

Sounds romantic, if she knew you, but, also sounds like an obsessed erotomaniacal stalker, if she does not.

I'd go for the cleaning and doing dishes though - nekked or not ;)

[diamondsmiles]

Originally Posted by diamondsmiles

Sorry to hear that, Mizz Russia. These days, it is really hard to trust anyone!

Hide all of your good stuff or the door to your bedroom until they pass your inspection.

The above paragragh should have read, "or CLOSE the door to your bedroom". I hate when I find typos after the fact.

[diamondsmiles]

Originally Posted by DannyDrama

I'd have got naked, smothered myself in cream, waited on her bed, and shouted 'COME AT ME, BITCH!' when she came home. That's how you REALLY charm a woman.

Have you tried this, danny? I try to keep an open mind.

[diamondsmiles]

Originally Posted by Blewvane

Just imagine what they did to your tooth brush!!

Eek! NOBODY uses my toothbrush, no matter what I did with a person!

On one of those undercover camera shows, a roommate was cleaning the toilet with another roommate's toothbrush! I'd throw up, then get every possible test for every kind of disease or poison they could check me for!

[hippie.chick]

now lets not get too judgmental. after all, thats how i met my boyfriend lol

[ices]

Originally Posted by diamondsmiles

The above paragragh should have read, "or CLOSE the door to your bedroom". I hate when I find typos after the fact.

Because humans cannot operate door handles!

[ices]

Originally Posted by hippie.chick

now lets not get too judgmental. after all, thats how i met my boyfriend lol

On rapelist? Sorry Craigslist.



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[kellyhound]

[Flaka]

He should've had dinner cooked first