One time i had to pick up a mother daughter double suicide by carbon monoxide...There bodies looked like a tie dye tshirt and their faces were beat red.
My brother in law did this but he went in the woods and rigged it with tubes through his door window, he died but his truck got so hot from running it caught fire and the whole thing was a huge mess!!R.I.P. Rick
Sorry for your loss, i know how it feels to be empty, time numbs the pain sort of, but do not EVER! dwell on things, fond memories should always prevail.
I feel that, my boss also took his life in a much more violent manner,but time may help.Emotional is a different kind of pain than physical,it does not always heal well.