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#1
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06-09-2019, 01:00 PM
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Nothing New : Free Verse
Copyright 2018 by SMS NOTHING NEW What good are all the lashes We endure beneath the sun? Another generation passes While a "new" one has begun. But the sun still rises, And the sun goes down, Bringing with it no suprises As it hurries back around. As the water falling splashes Into where the rivers run, On the shore a new wave crashes; Storms unleash on everyone. And the wind still rises, But the wind dies down, And there still are no surprises When it hurries back around.
__________________ Just so everyone knows, I did not get Anal last night, he must have been busy. - chirs |
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#2
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06-10-2019, 07:40 AM
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Re: Nothing New : Free Verse
If you're going to one-star a thread in here, at least have the balls to leave a critique.
__________________ Just so everyone knows, I did not get Anal last night, he must have been busy. - chirs |
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#5
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06-21-2019, 12:53 PM
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Re: Nothing New : Free Verse
Here’s my critique. The elements of this earth and in the story you tell exist, they do not have bad intentions. They are not unjust. They just are. The human in his small mind and short time spent enduring the elements, believes he must hurry. Why? Hurry, hurry, Die. |
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#6
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06-22-2019, 09:32 AM
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Re: Nothing New : Free Verse
Yes. All is vanity and a chasing after wind.
__________________ Just so everyone knows, I did not get Anal last night, he must have been busy. - chirs |
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#7
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06-26-2019, 03:31 PM
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Re: Nothing New : Free Verse
I didn't one-star the thread. Eating a thread hasn't worked for me in at least 6 months. Critique? Sure. What you wrote was akin to something the average 7th grader would write. Nothing interesting, insightful, and certainly nothing original.
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#8
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06-26-2019, 04:04 PM
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Re: Nothing New : Free Verse
Thanks. Your detailed analysis and constructive assessment will allow me to improve my skills as a writer. cri·tique /kriˈtēk/ noun 1. a detailed analysis and assessment of something, especially a literary, philosophical, or political theory.
__________________ Just so everyone knows, I did not get Anal last night, he must have been busy. - chirs |
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#9
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06-28-2019, 02:43 PM
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| So Fucking Banned Poster Rank:114 *** WHITE RACE TRAITOR AIDING THE JEWS IN THEIR QUEST FOR WORLD DOMINATION *** Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 13,896 Mentioned: 35 Post(s) Quoted: 11266 Post(s)
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Re: Nothing New : Free Verse
I didn't know this was DeviantArt? Shame Anal isn't here still (or is he?) because I would have been delighted to have informed him that I rated his thread one star without reading his poem. |