[DiamondSmiles]

By MF Jones
sickchirpse.com

April 1, 2014

There’s a reason this dude is smiling so hard in the photo; he’s still optimistic that he’s going to strike it rich following his decision to allow a hyena to feast on his penis, as instructed by a Zambian witch doctor who convinced him it would bring him sudden wealth.

Chamengeni Zulu, originally from Malawi, was told by the witch doctor that he’d have to sacrifice the body part to amass his fortune, but, was unable to tell Zulu where exactly the money would come from. Speaking to the Times of Zambia, Zulu said,

“I went to a bush where I was instructed to be naked. A hyena came to me and started eating my toes and eventually my manhood was eaten. Even though I have lost some important parts of my body, I still hope to get rich.”

The witch doctor declined to comment but the actual doctor treating Zulu said, “Yes, it’s true he lost his manhood and three toes after being bitten by a hyena, but his condition is stable.”

Welp, I guess those are the kind of things you’re going to believe when you’re desperate for cash and living amongst witch doctors in Zambia. But even if it was possible to strike it rich by feeding your penis to a hyena, would you do it?

I sure wouldn’t, and I always felt like I’d do most things for money. Still it’s great to see that Chamengeni Zulu hasn’t given up hope, laying there minus his penis and three toes, just waiting for his millions to fall from the sky.

[PlinyTheYounger]

My witch doctor build on Diablo 3 relies on Piranhas.

[Megamel29]

Anyone who would let a hyena eat their genitals, should probably let a hyena eat their genitals.

[DannyDrama]

I'm not going to ask how he got it to bite his cock off but hyenas are not known for biting where you want.

[Megamel29]

Originally Posted by DannyDrama ↗

I'm not going to ask how he got it to bite his cock off but hyenas are not known for biting where you want.

Maybe he wiggled it at the hyena like a worm?

[knuggy]

What the fucking fuck???

[winvens]

Meanwhile, the witch doctor is killing himself laughing at this idiot. "I can't believe he went through with it!"

The stupid shit people will do for money.

[253bumper]

damn that dude sucks lol

[DiamondSmiles]

He can tell the ladies, if he gets the money, that he's loaded.

Then, when one of them wants to have sex, he will some explaining to do.

[MrCorpse]

and the prophecy came true.. they probably paid him like $100 to do this interview, which would be a couple of years salary in that shit-hole. Sudden wealth!!!