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#1
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05-02-2013, 03:26 PM
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 ★ Legacy Member ★ Poster Rank:137 meow Join Date: Nov 2011 Posts: 12,242
Contributions: 61
12,242Posts 9,934Thanked 438Quoted 11Mentioned 61Contrib. |
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Burglary Suspect Masterbates, Play with Toy Helicopter and Eats Salad
*playS  St. Augustine, FL – A 23-year-old man is facing charges after police say he entered a couple’s home, masturbated, played with their toy helicopter and then ate a salad he had brought along with him. Jason Vickery apparently passed by the home sometime last Wednesday evening and noticed one of the doors was unlocked. Instead of entering the home immediately, Vickery reportedly went to his own home and grabbed a bag containing a wig, a pouch of chewing tobacco, a green towel and a salad. Vickery then returned to the unoccupied home, police say, and entered through the unlocked door. Vickery reportedly told police that upon entering the home, he headed to an upstairs bathroom to masturbate. Cause, you know, priorities and stuff. Once his worm was burped, Vickery wandered into the kitchen. On the kitchen counter he found a remote control helicopter, minus the batteries. “After searching for and finding batteries for the toy, he played with it, flying it for a short time, thus depriving the owner of the item,” police said. Vickery told police he heard voices coming from outside as he sat in the couple’s home and ate his salad. He got nervous, he said, and attempted to leave. He was met at the back door by the cops. He was booked on charges of burglary and larceny and ordered held on $27,500 bond. Police confiscated a bag of weed and drug paraphernalia, the wig, the towel and the tobacco. the towel?   · |
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#3
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05-02-2013, 06:30 PM
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 ★ Legacy Member ★ Poster Rank:416 Join Date: Feb 2011 Posts: 2,865
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2,865Posts 3,380Thanked 140Quoted 11Mentioned 17Contrib. |
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Re: Burglary Suspect Masterbates, Play with Toy Helicopter and Eats Salad
I love the fact that he left to get his salad and then enjoy happy time home alone. atleast he's eating healthy. A FUCKING SALAD!!
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#4
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05-02-2013, 06:54 PM
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| So Fucking Banned Poster Rank:273 Artful Dodger Join Date: Apr 2013 Posts: 5,083 5,083Posts 2,026Thanked 3,831Quoted 32Mentioned 0Contrib. |
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Re: Burglary Suspect Masterbates, Play with Toy Helicopter and Eats Salad
"Once his worm was burped"  |
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#5
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05-02-2013, 06:57 PM
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 My Rank: FIRST SERGEANT Poster Rank:415 Female Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 2,877
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2,877Posts 5,034Thanked 692Quoted 11Mentioned 6Contrib. |
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Re: Burglary Suspect Masterbates, Play with Toy Helicopter and Eats Salad
“After searching for and finding batteries for the toy, he played with it, flying it for a short time, thus depriving the owner of the item,” police said. Did he break it? |
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#6
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05-02-2013, 08:35 PM
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 Born in the USA Poster Rank:127 100% female Join Date: Jul 2012 Posts: 12,867
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12,867Posts 9,961Thanked 1,799Quoted 81Mentioned 1Contrib. |
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Re: Burglary Suspect Masterbates, Play with Toy Helicopter and Eats Salad
He had a fun night of activities planned for the family, good thing the cops showed up.
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#8
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05-03-2013, 03:06 PM
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 idiot savant with a ban stick Poster Rank:25 Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 54,355
Contributions: 29
54,355Posts 6,575Thanked 240Quoted 64Mentioned 29Contrib. |
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Re: Burglary Suspect Masterbates, Play with Toy Helicopter and Eats Salad
__________________ "Knowledge is often mistaken for intelligence. This is like mistaking a cup of milk for a cow" |
