Several years ago, Kit was working with the police department and asked someone, “I wonder what this little girl is doing now. I wonder if we could find her and see how she’s doing.” The police were able to locate Lisa, and Kit’s knock on Lisa’s door was the beginning of a very meaningful friendship.
Kit discovered that Lisa was in an abusive relationship of her own, but since they have met, Kit has helped Lisa walk through the process of ending that relationship. Lisa says that when she got pregnant with her second child something in her just snapped, and she knew she had to get out because she did not want to end up like her mother.
Lisa had no idea that her tape was being used to educate people about the effects of domestic violence on children. She only vaguely remembers signing away her rights to this tape, and no one ever told her why exactly they wanted it. Now as a twenty four year old woman, she still cannot listen to the tape because of all the pain she fears would surface.
She wonders why they picked this particular tape since she called the police hundreds of times. Through her tears, she shared with us that her mother had not changed, that her older brother was in jail, that her sister was getting into trouble, and that she feared for the future of her little brother. She pleaded with the Child Protective Service (CPS) workers in the room to always be mindful of the child victims of domestic violence.
The reality of her life and the lives of her siblings is a great testimony to the effects of domestic violence on children. Lisa told us that there were twenty-three documented cases of CPS coming to her house and that she nor her siblings were ever taken away from her mom. She said that she wishes she had been. Although she admitted that she would not have wanted to leave her mom initially, she said that in the end it would have been a better situation.
She challenged us to always remember the children when dealing with domestic violence because they have no control or power to change their situation.
Nov 21, 1990 San Diego, California.
Lisa: Stop it…. The baby… Stop it. Could you just send the police please!
Dispatcher: OK, we’re gonna be there. Who’s taking your baby?
Lisa: Stop it. No. Stop. I… Dreya, just, Dreya shut up.
Dispatcher: Let me talk to your ...., where’s your mom?
Dispatcher: What’s going on?
Lisa: They’re having some fighting. This has been going on forever and ever.
They always have this because he has company … and he’s always drinking beer and getting
drunk, and mom…
Dispatcher: What is his name? What is his name? Your father’s name? Is he Hispanic?
Lisa: He’s black.
Dispatcher: He’s your father?
Lisa: He’s my stepfather.
Dispatcher: OK, how old is he?
Lisa: I don’t know. I don’t know.
Dispatcher: Does he have any weapons?
Lisa: No, but he’s hurting mommy.
Dispatcher: How’s he hurting her?
Lisa: He’s making mommy ….
Dispatcher: OK. Don’t cry. We’re gonna send the police.
Dispatcher: Now where’s your mother at right now?
Lisa: She’s in the room fighting with him.
Dispatcher: But you have a little baby sister…
Lisa: No, I got a little baby brother and
Dispatcher: He’s trying to take the baby? He’s trying to take the baby brother?
Lisa: Momma’s not drunk..He thinks he’s drunk…Because he can’t say nothing he’s drunk.
Dispatcher: Are they in the room fighting? Where are they at now?
Lisa: They’re in the room still.
Dispatcher: They’re in the bedroom?
Lisa: Yea, I don’t want him to do nothing strange with the baby…
Because if he drops…He’s a newborn baby. He’s very delicate.
Dispatcher: What do you mean, do anything strange? What do you think he’s going to do
to your baby?
Lisa: I think he’s going to take the baby and do something because he’s drunk…. He
might …. go off with the baby if he takes it.
Dispatcher: How old are you?
Lisa: I’m 6 and my little sister’s 4.
Dispatcher: You’re a six year old. You’re six.
Lisa: Yea, I’m in first grade and my sister’s in kindergarten.
Dispatcher: What is your name? What is your name?
Lisa: Lisa. My sister’s name is Dreya. Excuse me.
Dispatcher: You’re only …OK
Lisa: OK. Could you just send the police?
Dispatcher: Yea, They’re on the way; I’m going to keep you on the line until they get
here. OK. Is your front door open?
Lisa: Oh no.
Dispatcher: Can you go unlock it and come back to the phone so the officers could get in?
Lisa: Just wait please.
Lisa: He just knocked my sister down.
Dispatcher: What sister did he knock down?
Lisa: My little sister, the 4 year old.
Dispatcher: What do you mean, he knocked her off?
Lisa: He pushed her down on the floor, and she’s crying.
I wish he would stop doing this. He did this ever since she had him..
He just …. He just slapped mommy.
Dispatcher: Which room are they in?
Lisa: My mom’s name is Cindy.
Dispatcher: OK, Which room are they in?
Lisa: They’re in their room.
Dispatcher: They’re in the back room or the bedroom?
Lisa: Oh my god…..
Dispatcher: What’s the matter?
Lisa: Something happened. Just please send the police.
Wait I want to go see what happened. Please…
Dispatcher: Ok. The police are on their way. Ok… Hello.. Oh shoot….
Lisa: Mommy …..My stepdaddy’s got the baby now.
Dispatcher: He has the baby now? Where is he at now?
Dispatcher: Lisa, where is he at right now?
Lisa: He’s still in the room. He’s got the baby. And he made some red marks on momma’s neck.
Dispatcher: He did what?
Lisa: He made some red marks on momma’s neck.
Dispatcher: Where did he make the red marks on with her neck?
Lisa: On her neck. On the right side, very dark. My momma’s going outside…
Lisa: Momma, don’t….
Mother: Shut up!
Lisa: The police are coming. Mommy….
Dispatcher: Hello, oh