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Old 08-16-2020, 05:10 AM
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Otters Wanted

Here are some pictures of me finally. I'm sorry it took so long ladies, but I've been pretty busy. I just hope some other hot guys were able to hold down the fort until now.

Anyhow, here is a nice mixed pack of photos of me--a sort of sample of my wares. In most of them you'll notice I'm doing different things. I'm doing all of them quite handsomely, of course--as per your request. I really am doing nothing in several as well though, but I still think that, as far as my hotness is concerned, everyone will agree that even in this static state I do remain fairly, if not, extremely hot.

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Personally, I like Otters. Or, that's to say girls that remind me of Otters: Ballerinas, Ninjas, Ballerinas wearing torn nylons, Ninjas wearing torn Ninja clothes with ballerina stuff under it. But I'm not actually picky, even only a semi professional Ballerina would suffice, if she were also able to Otter well enough.
Unfortunately, when it comes to the Ninjas I am a little more selective. I DEMAND!!! That a Ninja girl be better than just proficient in at least 15 of the 18 schools of discipine. I effing mean it too!
Bitch had better be able to pick our meals off of branches with little stones in her pockets!
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Aww hell yeah!!!
I'de be all up over you dude! Ooh Lordy Yes!
I'd be melting down coconut oil in your belly button and all sliding myself all over you like all the pantsless sea creatures you tell me to be. All types of slippery. You feelin' me bro?

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  #2  
Old 08-16-2020, 05:28 AM
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Re: OTTERS WANTED

Quote:
Originally Posted by Clubhouse View Post
Aww hell yeah!!!
I'de be all up over you dude! Ooh Lordy Yes!
I'd be melting down coconut oil in your belly button and all sliding myself all over you like all the pantsless sea creatures you tell me to be. All types of slippery. You feelin' me bro?
No, no, noway! I am a present for females only. I don't like to do the weener things at all, Ok? So just please. None of your slipperiness is permitted in here. I don't know that actually, but you should have to be more polite, and also a girl, to be able to come in here--that should be the rule.
Who even told you what Ottering was anyhow?
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No, no, noway! I am a present for females only. I don't like to do the weener things at all, Ok?
Aww, but goddamn come on! Don't piss me off. You're being like some kind of machine that launches hot lava pellets at my ass like tennis balls, and then rolls away into some pool hut before I can talk to it!
You don't like woodies? Just like Woodies Bro! And I can teach you how to load air soft guns.

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  #3  
Old 08-16-2020, 05:31 AM
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Re: OTTERS WANTED

Quote:
Originally Posted by Clubhouse View Post
Aww, but goddamn come on! Don't piss me off. You're being like some kind of machine that launches hot lava pellets at my ass like tennis balls, and then rolls away into some pool hut before I can talk to it!
You don't like woodies? Just like Woodies Bro! And I can teach you how to load air soft guns.
No, I don't like that. I don't want to think about woodies either. Woodies suck!
I have a whistle man. Seriously, you're making me uncomfortable.

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  #4  
Old 08-16-2020, 12:35 PM
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Re: Otters Wanted

Sorry ladies! I didn't think this was that kind of place you know?
I mean, I'm no square or anything, but That guy was just over the top.
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Hey! Dr Thrumpkinz I didn't know you looked like that. Jesus! You are a sexy guy. I mean for a guy. It's just a compliment.
Hey, did you hear? I was put in charge of Science! At my job. Soon, I'll be getting paid as much as Neil deGrasse Tyson.
I'll take you out to a rock concert when I do. How does that sound? Dinner and a rock show. Alright?

Hey do you like Poppers?

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  #5  
Old 08-16-2020, 12:48 PM
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Re: Otters Wanted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yanni View Post
Hey! Dr Thrumpkinz I didn't know you looked like that. Jesus! You are a sexy guy. I mean for a guy. It's just a compliment.
Hey, did you hear? I was put in charge of Science! At my job. Soon, I'll be getting paid as much as Neil deGrasse Tyson.
I'll take you out to a rock concert when I do. How does that sound? Dinner and a rock show. Alright?

Hey do you like Poppers?
No, I don't know. I don't know what that is?
But yeah, rock concerts are probably pretty fun. I mostly just listen to this one guy who shakes his change can sometimes. He's pretty good, dangerous though. Do you know that guy? It's like one of those Ham cans that you need a key to open.
Do you remember those?
I don't even like ham, but I do like to call those ones with the gridded string dents in them "Yoda Hams", because they look like Yoda's head.
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I don't even like ham, but I do like to call those ones with the gridded string dents in them "Yoda Hams", because they look like Yoda's head.
YOU TAKE YOUR GODDAMN PANTS DIRECTLY OFF AND TAKE A PHOTO OF YOUR PENIS AND LET ME SEE IT. THIS INSTANT!!!

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  #6  
Old 08-16-2020, 12:50 PM
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Re: Otters Wanted

Fuck! Are you serious?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yanni View Post
YOU TAKE YOUR GODDAMN PANTS DIRECTLY OFF AND TAKE A PHOTO OF YOUR PENIS AND LET ME SEE IT. THIS INSTANT!!!
Yeah! Fuckin bro! Are you?
Because it sounds like a pretty serious joke to me. Go and sell your stupid hot links some where else fucking Yanni. I was here first, I was just giving you the courtesy of finish your punchline before I swooped down for the close! So split Banana Head!
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*somewhere
Quote:
Originally Posted by Clubhouse View Post
So split Banana Head!
Nice one Retardy Savage! Are you fucking crazy? You sound like some kind of 50's rapist. And who even says "Split" anymore, or "Woody"?

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What is that shit supposed to scare me bro? I've seen bigger cocks on meth dialers. Pffft!
This is how you fill some shorts.

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What is that shit supposed to scare me bro? I've seen bigger cocks on meth *dealers. Pffft!
This is how you fill some shorts.
When? In 1934!!!

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  #7  
Old 08-17-2020, 05:08 AM
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Re: Otters Wanted

Everyone here fancies you my little darling!



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  #8  
Old 08-20-2020, 05:05 PM
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Re: Otters Wanted

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Originally Posted by Simone View Post
Everyone here fancies you my little darling!
Thank you. Yes, it's true.
But sadly, I think that those nerds may have frightened away all the Hunnies. I'll need to think of some way to remagnetize them all back here. Something, so powerful that the intense display of nerdy gaylordlyness above will pale in comparison to it.

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  #9  
Old 08-22-2020, 01:07 AM
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Re: Otters Wanted

Alright I'm fairly certain that enough time has past.
It's time to break out the big guns to redraw the girls back into sphere of hotness!
Yes! I will have to show some skin...

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  #10  
Old 08-22-2020, 01:10 AM
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Re: Otters Wanted

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Holy Christ yeah! I would emporkulate that thing until I died!

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Holy Christ yeah! I would emporkulate that thing until I died!
FUCK THAT! I WAS CLEARLY HERE FIRST.
Please, let my slipperiness all up in there Thrumpkinz?

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