Aftermath - Woman Was Split in Half While Trying to Cross Highway

AngelAssassin · #11 ● 09-13-2023, 10:42 PM

I believe that to not be a smile. She didn't have her dentures in.

The ol’ toothless smile… Many children have been fooled and taken in by this type of camouflage behavior, which is used by an especially singular breed, the elderly asshole.
They are viewed as a minor nuisance, their only seeming function in our society has been, and still is, to scare children.
Many neighborhoods have at least one elderly asshole. You can identify them by their calls, “Get off my lawn!”, “So help me…” and “I’m gonna call the cops!”
So the next time you are out of the house, stop and listen… If you are quiet, you may just be rewarded by hearing tone in the wild!

AngelAssassin · #12 ● 09-13-2023, 10:47 PM

One, not tone…

docfr8 · #13 ● 09-13-2023, 10:50 PM

Banana splits

Mr.NoCredit · #14 ● 09-13-2023, 11:30 PM

Once again a top and bottom half.

Can we please get a left and right half next time!?

William May · #15 ● 09-14-2023, 01:56 AM

Originally Posted by Killgaad ↗

If my long-deceased better half looked this happy after such a half-baked, half-assed, half-hearted attempt to make it in one piece (NOT)—halfway down a busy highway, I'd take her out of the freezer for a brief half-Marathon down to the busiest embalming gas station halfway down to the local halfway house in the lower-half of the Lower Manhattan Project, where we used to live with our half-life, half-breed radioactive decay Children Of The Corn.

R.I.P., Momma.

Well, you sure cheered ME up!

William May · #16 ● 09-14-2023, 01:57 AM

Originally Posted by Killgaad ↗

If my long-deceased better half looked this happy after such a half-baked, half-assed, half-hearted attempt to make it in one piece (NOT)—halfway down a busy highway, I'd take her out of the freezer for a brief half-Marathon down to the busiest embalming gas station halfway down to the local halfway house in the lower-half of the Lower Manhattan Project, where we used to live with our half-life, half-breed radioactive decay Children Of The Corn.

R.I.P., Momma.

This lone post is worth 5 corns, EASILY!!!

I'm STILL blowing Fritos out of my nose!