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#1
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08-24-2019, 09:59 PM
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 My Rank: LANCE CORPORAL Poster Rank:2077 Hombre Join Date: Apr 2018 Posts: 235 Mentioned: 4 Post(s) Quoted: 50 Post(s)
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My Fingus
A very sharp kaniff.
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#2
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08-25-2019, 04:13 AM
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 ✝Mudderator from Hell✝ Poster Rank:10 e-mail Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 95,066
Contributions: 817
Mentioned: 472 Post(s) Quoted: 10092 Post(s)
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Re: My Fingus
Hope it doesn't get infected. Some healing aftermath vids/pics are appreciated also  |
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#3
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08-25-2019, 04:54 AM
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 Für Immer Verloren Poster Rank:50 Boredom + Despair Join Date: Sep 2017 Posts: 30,253
Contributions: 666
Mentioned: 136 Post(s) Quoted: 10331 Post(s)
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Re: My Fingus
Any story about what happened?
__________________ "I'd give the world for the chance just to see your face again. Still I pretend that you're still standing by." |
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#4
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08-25-2019, 12:38 PM
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 Addict Of Misery Poster Rank:69 Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 22,177 Mentioned: 18 Post(s) Quoted: 9547 Post(s)
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Re: My Fingus
I'm putting my money on a kitchen mishap.
__________________ A deep well of despair I found, the day my dreams came true... |
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#5
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08-25-2019, 02:56 PM
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| Für Immer Verloren Poster Rank:50 Boredom + Despair Join Date: Sep 2017 Posts: 30,253
Contributions: 666
Mentioned: 136 Post(s) Quoted: 10331 Post(s)
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Re: My Fingus
 I bet his rabbit did it, in it's cage with a carrot. I don't know why I even bother, that's not even remotely funny!
__________________ "I'd give the world for the chance just to see your face again. Still I pretend that you're still standing by." |
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#6
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08-25-2019, 04:33 PM
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| My Rank: LANCE CORPORAL Poster Rank:2077 Hombre Join Date: Apr 2018 Posts: 235 Mentioned: 4 Post(s) Quoted: 50 Post(s)
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Re: My Fingus
Its embarrassing... very caddyshack like.. so I have this evil fucking gopher in my yard that I've been trying to kill for 5 months now. I've tried everything, drowning him, shooting him, traps, poisonous treats, the whole shebang. I'm yagoogaling and I see this funnel device for thunkin onto the end of your truck exhaust and killing them like people do in their garages with suicide. I thought "genious!!! I dont need no stinking purchased device, I'll make my own out of an arrowhead water bottle". So I set the whole apparatus up with a hose into the bastards most recently dug hole, a hole mind you, that he mad emerge directly next to the drivers door of my truck. A direct provocation to me and my manhood. I start my truck up and smugly start walking to my gayrage when after about 5 mins I hear the bottle pop off the muffler. I walk down to reattach it and bend down to cut the old duct tape off with my brand new, razor sharp pocket kaniff. I grab ahold of the bottle and put the kaniff under the duct tape and cut hard. Sliced right through the tape and then right through my fingus that is emerging slightly above the edge of the bottle. It was like a samurai sword through one of those bamboo mats. I looked at my fingus nub and at my finger piece laying on the ground...
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#7
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08-25-2019, 04:36 PM
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| My Rank: LANCE CORPORAL Poster Rank:2077 Hombre Join Date: Apr 2018 Posts: 235 Mentioned: 4 Post(s) Quoted: 50 Post(s)
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Re: My Fingus
Luckily I have a trauma kit in all of my vehicles, and I have my best kit right next to me. I was able to blast it with iodine prep and wrap it in gauze and koban immediately. I bleed like a stuck pig because I had 4 beers in me. I had to drive my happy ass in Seattle traffic to the veterans hospital. It was another miserable 4.5 hours later they had me walking out with "sorry it's to small to sew back on and it'll heal.. in like 6 months." One of the worst er experiences of my life.
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#8
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08-25-2019, 04:39 PM
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| My Rank: LANCE CORPORAL Poster Rank:2077 Hombre Join Date: Apr 2018 Posts: 235 Mentioned: 4 Post(s) Quoted: 50 Post(s)
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Re: My Fingus
I'll keep updating here as to the recovery. It hurts really fuckin bad when I bump the wrapped nub. I'm a handyman so I am sorta fucked. More like a handman meow. At least now I can flip people off and say "hey look I cut the tip of my fingus off"  |
