[SalemSaberhagen]

Wait.... something doesn't make sense her re the article;

PUBLISHED: December 29, 2005 at 2:44 p.m. | UPDATED: May 8, 2016 at 6:17 a.m.

Why was the article updated ELEVEN YEARS LATER?

[DanteAntonelli]

He sure has more than a chip on the shoulder, more like a shoulder on his chips.

[Jonnyb75]

Originally Posted by Eldeanio100 ↗

Every man is thinking”thank god his junk was unharmed” lucky escape there

Perhaps he had a helmet on his erm... Helmet

[CatBatMan]

“An intact and circumcised penis” were recovered. So this guy apparently had two dicks, one of each variety? “Intact” is the complete polar opposite of circumcised. This should have said that his entire circumcised penis was recovered.