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#1
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07-31-2009, 07:44 AM
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| My Rank: PRIVATE Poster Rank:7995 Male Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 22 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Quoted: 0 Post(s)
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Locomotive Engineer, Just Had My 7th Suicide!
I'm a locomotive engineer by profession (hence my username, if you're a railroader, you'd understand it.), and I can tell you the one thing that ALWAYS surprises me most when we have a suicide, is the "victim's" complete and utter commitment to the act. In four years at the throttle, I've had six suicides (not including today), and two more before that while I was a conductor), and I've never even heard of someone do so much as flinch when they jump onto the tracks. They're never half-hearted... they ALWAYS do it! Truly mind-boggling human behavior. This particular video posted HERE gets to me so much more than the 'gory aftermath' images elsewhere on this site. Gore is gore is gore... but seeing someone's eyes at the moment they've chosen to end their life is something that continues to haunt me ever since my first "trespasser incident" several years ago. The railroad graciously offers three days off, and a meeting with a totally useless and clueless PTSD counselor... yeah, that's totally sufficient help for dealing with continually getting a front-row seat to people's suicides! Anyway, I visit this site because I find it very therapeutic somehow... (don’t ask me why!) and if anybody has any questions for me, I'd be very happy to answer. This is the only place I know of where I can discuss the horrors I've seen, or even my morbid fascination with the physics involved when 79-mph train meets a stationary 200 pound man. When the newspapers talk of the victims, they inevitably leave out us engineers, our conductors, and the 1st-responders on the scene. Just don't forget these suicides hurt far more people than those selfish SOB's out there killing themselves!!! tryin' to stay sane, had my 7th  fatality this week! -All my best, -"J1"
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#2
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07-31-2009, 07:52 AM
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| My Rank: PRIVATE Poster Rank:6597 Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 32 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Quoted: 2 Post(s)
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Re: Locomotive Engineer, Just Had My 7th Suicide!
I ran over an animal that jumped at my car 1m ahead when i was accelerating after turning at intersection. There was nothing i could have done to prevent it... So i sorta have an idea what you feel when the poor people take on with a train, even though my involuntary kill was "just" an animal...  |
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#3
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07-31-2009, 08:01 AM
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 idiot savant with a ban stick Poster Rank:24 Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 54,331
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Mentioned: 62 Post(s) Quoted: 236 Post(s)
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Re: Locomotive Engineer, Just Had My 7th Suicide!
nice post J1 
__________________ "Knowledge is often mistaken for intelligence. This is like mistaking a cup of milk for a cow" |
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#6
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07-31-2009, 10:01 AM
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 My Rank: LANCE CORPORAL Poster Rank:2018 Male Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 243 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Quoted: 17 Post(s)
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Re: Locomotive Engineer, Just Had My 7th Suicide!
Great post. Just like to confirm, you've just had your 7th suicide in 1 week??? That's incredible in some places more than one a day....... |
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#7
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07-31-2009, 11:03 AM
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 My Rank: LANCE CORPORAL Poster Rank:2409 Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 186 Mentioned: 0 Post(s) Quoted: 0 Post(s)
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Re: Locomotive Engineer, Just Had My 7th Suicide!
Brilliant post, fascinating. My grandad was a railway driver (in the uk) and had many suicides over the years, but amazingly enough the thing that effected him the most was when a cow got on the line. He said the sound and the mess was something else. He couldnt eat beef for years  Nelmser I think he meant this week his 7th suicide happened. |
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#9
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07-31-2009, 11:07 AM
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 My Rank: MASTER SERGEANT Poster Rank:547 Meat 'n two veg Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 1,827
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Re: Locomotive Engineer, Just Had My 7th Suicide!
No nelmser... I think he meant 7th overall this week. still heavy duty stats all the same  I'd be in a padded cell after 2 or 3.  Sorry Peppermint.... niver saw your post. |
