Death at Dark's Door

**Vedderman** · #1 ● 01-26-2016, 03:47 PM

This classy woman of 33 years, bearing a lengthy charge sheet, a murdered ex-con husband, and the dubious nickname of 'The Dark', was executed in her home a few nights ago.

Neighbors reported that a man showed up at her place late in the evening, knocking loudly on the door and calling out to her by her sobriquet. When she finally answered, the gentleman caller produced a pistol and tried to put an end to her darkened ways.

It seems that her slovenly lifestyle and pendulous beer belly belied a preternatural sense of celerity, as she managed to slam the door in his face before any bullets hit her. The assailant, only momentarily stymied by the undoubtedly-epic craftsmanship of her particle board door, blew the thing off its hinges with a destructive two-punch combo of well-placed bullets and flip-flop kicks.

Unfortunately for 'The Dark', she ran out of hiding places and the mysterious killer then cornered her on the patio at the back of her house. Despite pleading for her life, she was shot in the head and left to bleed out on the pavement while he made good his escape. The neighboring witnesses claimed that he was talking on a cell phone as he fled and was overheard to say "The job's done." to the anonymous recipient of his call.

When the police searched the deceased's home, they found an abundance of drug-related items, as well as fake ID's, checkbooks, and dozens of stolen credit cards.